I was walking behind two young women downtown last week, young working women. One was saying to the other how important her independence was to her. I believe they were talking about their relationships with men. And I couldn't help but think that young woman might indeed be independent (well at least until she got sick or something adverse that would make her realise she had been dependent all along but just never knew it) but she would probably end up alone.
How feminism has betrayed women. At one time, it was about equal rights when it came to job opportunities, education, civil rights, important stuff like that where the sexes should be equal. But instead, it has put a chasm between men and women so that we no longer trust each other and so few are willing to risk commitment.
I know that it is not wise to over-simplify things but in some sense, we have over-complicated life; we have neglected what was really important in our relationships. Now women are obliged to get educated, to establish careers rather than just jobs; to have children means to sacrifice what they spent so much time on. So now the family and children are sacrificed because women somehow got what they thought they wanted and it is just too dear to give it all up to become a "second class citizen", a wife and mother. Feminism has robbed women of their primary role as lovers and care-givers.
And yet, so many are incredibly lonely, both women and men.
I knew love when it still meant forever When a feeling shared didn’t always have to hurt. And a promise that was made Would go unbroken, I knew love when it was more than just a word.
I knew a time when hope was all you needed And if you cared, you found a way to make things work. When life was what two people shared together Oh I knew love when it was more than just a word.
I knew love when I could still believe It was the greatest power in the world I knew love when it was more than just a word.
I knew hearts when they made it all so easy Sad goodbyes were seldom ever heard When I wouldn’t have to read this note That says you’re leaving I knew love when it was more than just a word.
I knew love when I could still believe It was the greatest power in the world I knew love when it was more than just a word. I knew love when it was more than just a word. - Nanci Griffith
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Two years ago, when I was attending the national pro-life conference of Canada in Moncton, a Baptist minister from Boston gave a talk entitled "Cross Bearing for the Child Bearing". I recall hearing for the first time about the disproportionate number of black and hispanic children being aborted. And he stated that abortion would end in the United States, when these minority groups became aware of what was being done and became the leaders of the pro-life movement.
I believe that is happening, as I read about more and more African-American pastors getting really vocal about what abortion is doing to their race.
And now, Georgia Right to Life and Radiance Foundation are launching the "Endangered Species Project". They have erected 62 billboards in two counties of Georgia where 67% of the state's abortions are performed.
I can't even imagine being able to do this in Canada. Just today we have heard that a television network in Kelowna, BC has renegged on their decision to air the pro-life ad that I blogged about a few days ago. They claim that the ad is too graphic and will offend people. Oh sure, as if we family-oriented types aren't already offended by the sexualized ads they air day and night or we don't find offensive all the programming that states before it begins: Warning - coarse language and sexually explicit scenes. But they can't show the hand and forearm of an aborted baby?
I would venture a guess that there is no place in Canada where a billboard like the one above could be set up. And I would also say that no television network would have the guts to air an ad like the one that will CBS will air during the SuperBowl this Sunday.
Has no one in the mainstream media of Canada got any backbone at all?
I have heard this tale repeated by various people from different churches: when the subject of abortion is presented in a youth group, the youth leader gets a volley of complaints from parents. And his freedom in this area of teaching is restricted. I asked a youth leader why he thought this happened and he thought that the parents were being overly protective of their children, not wanting them to find out things that are kind of gross for want of a better word.
I always wondered if perhaps the parents were trying to stop any discussion of the subject because of skeletons in their closets; the topic was just coming a little too close to home.
But this past weekend, the woman mentioned in the last post (director of the Pregnancy Care Centre here) said that the discussion of sexual morality (and abortion is the clean-up for unchaste behaviour) is not welcomed by Christian parents because they themselves were the ones who grew up in the sexual revolution. Their own behaviour won't stand much scrutiny but now they wish to raise families with Christian values and they are having trouble putting their past behaviour together with their present duties.
I have been mulling this over and thinking of people I know whose children have made choices that their parents wish they hadn't. And people who didn't feel that they had the right to give strong advice to their children. My generation has been raised in the rejection of Dr. Spock and we have been taught that our children are basically "good" persons, and that we should trust that "goodness" when they make major life decisions. Somehow we let ourselves off the hook when it comes to giving explicit moral advice, especially in the area of sexual morality.
And the thought came to me so clearly this morning over breakfast, while watching a clip from Focus on the Family. I wondered why it was that these strong evangelicals have no problem speaking clearly on moral issues, why they believe that parents need to be firm with their children in this area, even if sometimes they come across as dogmatic. They are not afraid to be dogmatic, to be clear, because they know that lives are at stake. Children make some very unwise choices, and some of those choices lead them down paths from which they may never return.
It is the confession of one's sins and faults that gives someone the authority to advise others.
So biblical, I must find the relevant passages and mark them down. But it was so clear; those Christian leaders who speak clearly on moral issues are often people who have had major conversions in their own lives. They have openly confessed their wrongs and have turned from them. It is that confession and the turning that gives them the ability and the authority to speak now. I am not advocating public truth-telling sessions; that would be unwise and unkind; but owning up to one's mistakes as mistakes or "sins" in the Christian context, not just as life experiences, seems to be the key here.
This explains why the father who had an affair that has been kept a secret cannot advise his son on the proper way to date and to marry a girl. And the son is often locked into behaviour that doesn't demand he grow up. There are so many young people today who live with someone for a while, then someone else, and a trail of broken relationships is all they have to show by the time they are forty. They can't seem to settle down. And they haven't been told that the way they are living is not right. After all, they are trusted to be the best judges of their own lives and eventually love will fix everything. They just haven't found the right person yet.
What a falsehood to be living with! But if the father who began the lie would only confess openly and admit that he had done wrong, lives could be built once again on the right foundation.
Everyone fails, everyone makes mistakes. It is in facing the truth of our failings and mistakes that we find freedom. And that freedom isn't for us only; it brings freedom to those around us. For parents who can confess to their wrongs, they acquire the freedom to speak with authority to their children. As always, "then you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free." (John 8:32)
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. James 5:16
Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow ... Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me ... Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will turn back to you. - Psalm 51:7, 10, 13
The use of graphic imagery to make the case against abortion is hotly debated amongst pro-lifers. Some are adamant that it is just too horrific, that it subjects the unsuspecting passerby to images for which they are not prepared, and that it causes many to become angry. Other pro-lifers feel that, unless people actually witness the graphic reality of abortion, they will simply never understand how awful it is.
I used to be of the second opinion; I was pretty convinced that people needed to be shocked, because something shocking was going on and they were simply "not getting it".
I realise the video above shows a graphic photo of the hand of an aborted baby, but that is the only image and it isn't gruesome and bloody like the large posters with all the body parts. The message on the video is very simple:
Let us mourn for these children May our hearts be broken enough for God to enter and stir us to action to defend their lives.
Stirred to action, that is the purpose of the pro-life movement - to stir people to action, many people, all people to act for those who cannot defend themselves.
This past weekend, I spent with the director of the local crisis pregnancy centre here in Halifax. It is now called the Pregnancy Care Centre, as teens (those who have the most unplanned pregnancies) cannot relate to the word "crisis". The director is one of the most Christian women I have ever met; she set up this centre and has run it for the past 23 years. She has given tirelessly of her time and energy and she has gone even further, adopting the baby of the centre's very first client and she now fosters four children who would have no home otherwise.
She has seen it all; she was moved to work in this ministry when she cared for a woman who had jumped from the roof of the hospital. After three months of treatment for depression, she escaped the psychiatric ward, found her way to the roof and jumped. Her jump did not end her life; but it did leave her paralysed from the neck down. In the emergency room, she kept repeating "it hurts, it hurts". Willa had been assigned to stay with her and, as she held her hand, she asked "where does it hurt?" The woman shouldn't have felt any pain as her spinal column had been severed and with it all the nerves to her torso and limbs. She said "my heart" and then out came the story of her abortion five years previous. Willa resolved then and there that she would work in this ministry in order to prevent women from believing the lies about abortion.
All those years of experience with girls and women facing unplanned and unwanted pregnancies, some of whom did abort and others who carried their babies to term, and what does this lady have to say about abortion?
Abortion is not the problem. The problem is that these women don't know Christ. They need a relationship with Him first. My job is to use this opportunity to offer them that relationship.
The problem is that our relationship with God our Father has been broken. And it can only be restored by meeting the person of Jesus Christ.
What does this have to do with graphic imagery? Well, that imagery may change someone's mind about abortion, although I suspect that it creates more anger in people than it does a change of mind. But the imagery doesn't bring them any closer to Christ.
I am not saying that graphic imagery should never be used. Actually, I think that it can be used to great effect as the Genocide Awareness Project uses it, on university campuses. This is a venue where students see other displays of graphic imagery and where they are challenged, as in no other time of their life, to think critically about important issues. Those who run the GAP are also there to talk with students who question what they are doing; the signs are accompanied by good information. People are not just shocked by the signs, but are engaged in discussion.
But for the general public, on a busy street, graphic imagery will probably produce more shock and anger than true conversion of mind and heart.
Bryan Kemper, the founder of Stand True, has been protesting abortion for 16 years. He founded the group that goes into schools and organizes the campaign where students put duct tape with the word Life written on it, and they don't speak for the entire day. They are silent in solidarity with the unborn who have no voice. And their efforts meet with great success. Kids love to do something like that, and the last time they did it, 57 girls (across the US) who were pregnant decided not to abort their babies because of the duct tape effort.
Bryan used to go to abortion clinics and protest loudly, holding graphic signs to scare the women out of having an abortion. He thought it was the thing to do and that saving the baby's life was to be done at all costs. Now he says:
Yes, we believe abortion is the act of killing a human person and should never be permitted. Yes, we believe abortion is a sin and is detestable in God's eyes. Yes, we believe we need to stand up against this evil and be there to help people keep from making such a tragic and horrific mistake. But more importantly than all of that, we believe those people need Christ, and we need to love them as Christ would...
We are committed to achieving these goals in love. And we will go to the abortion mills to be a voice for those who are dying horrible deaths there. But we will treat the abortion mill like a mission field (italics mine) rather than a protest zone.
Having organized two campaigns for 40 Days for Life here in Halifax, I have seen the fruits of what a witness of peaceful, non-confrontational prayer can do. We have heard of one girl who changed her mind about having an abortion and we have heard of one social worker who requested a re-assignment away from the abortion clinic. Plus a nurse who thanked us for being there; she has witnessed abortions and felt compelled to seek work elsewhere as she is being compromised in that hospital. Prayer bringing about changes of heart, without violence, without any shouting. We didn't get people shouting at us to leave the sidewalk; most people walk by quietly showing respect for the fact that we are just praying.
I believe that God has called me to be faithful to that prayer witness. To bring graphic signs into it would break that peace. Right now, that public sidewalk has been soaked with the prayers of hundreds of people and we have asked God for His protection on that place. It is a sacred place now, a place where Christ can come and minister. And He always does that in love.
Ralph McInerny (1929-2010) died after a battle with esophageal cancer on January 29, 2010. I was surprised to find that he received his PhD from Laval University in Quebec (who even knew he had been to Canada?). He is best known in academic circles for his years as philosophy professor at Notre Dame University. He wrote more than two dozen scholarly books, as well as translating the texts of St. Thomas Aquinas for Penguin Classics. With Michael Novak, he founded Crisis, a journal of lay Catholic opinion now known as Inside Catholic. As if that wasn't enough, he also wrote 80 novels, most of the mystery genre, and under various pen names including Monica Quill, Harry Austin amongst others. His most famous novels were the Father Dowling mysteries which became a television series.
I have loved these novels of Ralph McInerny's. As my daughter emailed me this morning: "Every time I think of him I get a warm and nostalgic feeling ... I always feel so safe when I read his books." Precisely - warm and safe.
This was a man who loved his Catholic faith and salted his writing liberally with his beliefs. I was intrigued to find that his initial efforts at writing were rejected; I also read somewhere that he wrote novels and short stories after work hours to make more money to support his large family of seven children. Facing this rejection, he decided to be serious about writing and he wrote for four hours per day for a year (10 pm - 2 am). The result was his first novel The Priest which became a best seller. I read that novel about two years ago and was captivated by it; it was a current relating of the crisis in the Catholic Church brought about by the papal encyclical Humanae Vitae, in which Pope Paul VI stunned the Catholic clergy of America by standing firm against artificial contraception.
Ralph writes further about this theme of the Church's stand on marriage, children, and contraception in some of his other novels and one gets the feeling that he wants to convey the rightness of the Church teaching in this area. I guess that should be obvious given the size of his own family.
I didn't know that Ralph was pre-deceased by his wife Connie and it is touching to read that he felt after she died, that his life was posthumous. They must have been close friends, the secret of a happy marriage.
In recent news, Ralph's name came up as opposing the invitation of President Obama to Notre Dame University and the conferring of an honorary law degree upon him. I can't find it now, but I recall that McInerny said that Our Lady, whose statue adorned the top of the dome, was weeping over this. He mourned the loss of faith at Notre Dame University as the emphasis on the academic credentials of staff took precedence over their authentic Catholic faith. Something that many of us can agree with, as the President of Notre Dame, Father Jenkins, refuses to drop the charges against the 88 pro-life protestors who objected to Obama's speech there.
All of this would make him sound like rather a serious fellow, but he was known for his wit and charm and his love of puns, as witnessed by the titles of many of his books. Apparently he once introduced his wife by saying "have you met my first wife, Connie?" He was also known to be "remarkably generous with his time and his help, especially for his students, in whose families he expressed an avid interest." - Thomas Hibbs
A wonderful scholar, a wonderful writer, and it seems a wonderful man. He will be missed. God rest his soul.
It is quite astonishing that the media continue to ignore the March for Life, which this year drew over 300,000 people, over half of whom were under 30 years of age. Where were the young women? one reporter asked. Obviously he didn't look very far, since the photo he submitted to The Washington Post was a tiny group of five pro-choice protestors.
And Rick Sanchez of CNN wondered out loud "which side there were more of"; obviously he didn't look closely at the crowd. Because it was totally obvious that the handful of pro-choice people were simply that, a handful while the pro-life crowd filled the streets and just kept coming.
The other media story worth noting is the efforts being made by pro-choice advocates to have CBS pull the forthcoming Superbowl ad featuring Tim Tebow, a college football superstar, who shares the pro-life story of how his mother refused the medical advice to abort him when she contracted amoebic dysentery in the Phillipines. It looks as if CBS is going to stand firm and air the ad, which has been completely paid for by specific donations to Focus on the Family.
If CBS airs the ad, good for them since last year the pro-life ad "Imagine the Potential" was not aired during the Superbowl, but has received millions of views on YouTube.
Eventually, the mainline media is going to have to give due attention to what is going on in pro-life news, because they are simply getting outnumbered.
I read with interest that this past week, Fox News has surpassed CNN in the number of Americans who trust it to deliver primetime news. Fox has moved into first place, while the other outlets have dropped their ratings as people realise that their reporting is so biased, leaning always toward the left and endorsing the current Democratic government. Listen closely, you will hear the sounds of cracks breaking open the truth. Good news indeed.
Married for 35 years to Nick, mother to three grown daughters, grandmother to Jacob, Hannah, Benjamin, Rhett, Joseph, and Jasper.
Board member of Campaign Life Coalition; Roman Catholic faith; adamantly pro-life
